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to tell you the truth :

• gue ga suka sendiri, ditinggal. tapi siapa sih yang suka? mungkin gue egois, gue tau. mungkin juga gue salah, gue tau. mungkin gue ada trauma gara" nyokap gue uda meninggal, di tinggal sama orang yang gue care.
• gue terlalu care, pasti mikirin ini itu ato segala macem.
• gue kalo diem, bisa tiba" jadi banyak pikiran.
• gue punya banyak banget masalah yang bener" gue ga bisa handle yang mungkin suka bikin gue nangis diem" tiba". gara" itu gue suka bingung, lepas kendali, ga sadar kebawa emosi mungkin.
• gue jealousan. gue pengen bisa have fun sama temen" cuma mungkin ada beberapa hal yang gue ga biasa lakuin tapi temen" gue biasa dan akhirnya gue cuma bisa liat mereka have fun tanpa gue. to tell you the truth, itu nyesek banget buat gue soalnya gue ga bisa kek gitu. jadi gue lebih baik menyendiri ato pegi ninggalin mereka biar ga nyesek. ato mungkin delete bbm mereka karena liat dari foto" mereka dan ga ada gue, itu juga nyesek banget gila buat gue. yaa, mungkin itu akhirnya jadi salah menurut mereka. cuma mereka kan ga ngerasain apa yang gue rasain gimana selama ini.
• gue suka ngotot, keras kepala, gue ga biasa minta maaf ato ngakuin kesalahan gue. jadi kalo mpe gue ngakuin kesalahan gue, brarti gue care dan gue ga mau kehilangan tu orang yang uda gue bikin sakit hati. yaa, mau sebesar apa kesalahan gue ato mau sesakit hati apa lu, mau gue secara sengaja ato ga sengaja ngulang kesalahan, seketerlaluannya gue, kalo mpe gue ngaku itu berarti gue udah ngalah. mungkin lu pada ga ngerti gue yaa. tapi ini lah gue. but who are you to judge me? I know I screw things up all the time. people just do. and you do too.
• gue gampang kesindir.
• gue suka negative thinking.
• gue miskin, I'm just broke. and trying to be greatful and can't do anything about it.
• gue menyedihkan, I'm just pathetic.
• I can get annoyed easily.

well, I just confess to you all. don't know should or shouldn't I ashame of myself. but I'm still human. I have a lot bad sides. I screw up. I made mistakes. I can get emotional too.

but still, I have feelings too. and so many things people just don't understand me but there're just act like are. and that's sucks.

don't judge people, you don't even know clearly why people do such things. remember that..

long holiday

man! this long holiday's sucks. so boring.
I wish my family was rich, I probably won't tell you guys how boring my holiday is.
but "it is what it is".

all I did was sleeping all day long.
well, at least no need to study, do homework, wake up early, etc and I could dream all day long. yeah, dream like live in my imagination world where everything's just so beautiful there. anyway, in the end people have to wake up right? that's sucks. but still, I'm trying to be greatful here.

ohh my, I forgot! it's july already. it means long holiday will be over soon. even though it sucks, but gonna miss it. well, it's time for me to prepare to be a 11th grader student and WOOHOOO!!! I'm in social class; free from science dude! LOL

starting all over

hey again, akiko here and I'm starting all over the blog.
I hope it's going to be better than before. *finger cross*

anyway, the purpose of me to starting all over this blog is to share things about me and the truth. most of it. yeah, and some other things too.

fyi, I'm half Indonesian so I might often use Indonesian language in this blog of mine.

so this is "shut up and read".
not interested? the go.